It was Christmas Day, 1886, and the 14 year old Thérèse hurried quickly home from Church. It was the custom, in France, for children to leave their shoes by the hearth and then parents would fill them with gifts. By the age of 14 most children, however, had grown out of this custom but Celine, Thérèes’s sister, didn’t want her to grow up. She would make sure presents had been left in the shoes of ‘baby Thérèse’. The two children were all set to go up to bed when they heard their father sigh saying, ‘Thank goodness that’s the last time we shall have this kind of thing.’
Thérèse froze, and her sister looked at her helplessly. Celine knew that in a few minutes Thérèse would be in tears over what her father had said. However, the tears never came! Something incredible had happened; Jesus had helped Thérèse to be more sensitive to her father’s feelings. She walked slowly down the stairs and looked at the gift in her shoe, full of joy, as if she hadn’t heard anything her father had said. That Christmas had such a profound effect on her that she referred to it as her conversion.
Although many people refer to Thérèse as the Little Flower, do not be tempted to think that she was a weak character. On the contrary, when the superior of the Carmelite Convent refused to take Thérèse because she was thought to be too young, this formerly shy, reserved girl went to the Bishop and even when the Bishop said no, that didn’t stop her neither; she decided to go over his head as well!
To distract her from her crazy idea of entering Carmel, both her father and her sister took her to Rome on pilgrimage. This had the adverse effect! This made her all the more set on entering Carmel. Thérèse was in her element; because she was young and small, she could run everywhere, touch the tombs, the relics, in fact, everything holy and everything that looked holy. Thérèse even had the opportunity, with many other pilgrims, to meet the Pope, and was instructed prior not to speak with the Pope! The time of the Audience came and when the Pope passed by her, she seized the chance to speak with him. So young and small, as soon as he got near, she ran to him and begged him to let her enter the Carmelite Convent. She was so insistent that she had to be carried away by two of the guards!
Her actions had not gone unnoticed! The Vicar General, who had seen her courage, was so impressed that soon Thérèse was admitted to the Carmelite Convent where her other sisters, Pauline and Marie, had already joined. Her romantic ideas of convent life, however, soon met up with reality when her father suffered a series of strokes that left him physically and mentally affected. She suffered terribly not being able to visit him. Thérèse was so moved with grief that she found it difficult to pray. She remarks in her diary that ‘Jesus isn’t doing much to keep the conversation going.’ She would often fall asleep praying for her father.
She knew as a Carmelite nun she would never be able to perform great deeds. ‘Love proves itself by deeds, so how am I to show my love? Great deeds are forbidden me. The only way I can prove my love is by scattering flowers and these flowers are every little sacrifice, every glance and word, and the doing of the least actions for love.’ She took every chance to sacrifice, no matter how small it would seem. She smiled at the sisters she didn’t like. She ate everything she was given without complaining, even when it was the worst of the leftovers.
When Pauline, her sister, was elected prioress, she asked Thérèse for the ultimate sacrifice. She asked Thérèse to remain a novice, in order to allay the fears of the others that the three sisters would push everyone else around. This meant she would never be a fully professed nun. This sacrifice, however, was made a little sweeter when Celine entered the convent after her father’s death. Four of the sisters were now together again.
Thérèse continued to worry about how she could achieve holiness in the life she led. She didn’t want to just be good; she wanted to be a saint! She thought there must be a way for people living hidden, little lives like hers. ‘Unfortunately when I have compared myself with the saints, I have always found that there is the same difference between the saints and me as there is between a mountain whose summit is lost in the clouds and a humble grain of sand trodden underfoot by passers-by… I will look for some means of going to heaven by a little way which is very short and very straight, a little way that is quite new.’
In 1896, Thérèse became seriously ill. She tried to keep on working without telling anyone she was ill. She knew that death would come quick and in one sense, she was sad that she felt she had not achieved anything great with her life. Little did she know the journals Pauline, her sister, had ordered her to write under obedience would be her lasting legacy. Pauline encouraged her to finish her journal so that they would have something to circulate on her life after her death.
Though death was imminent, Thérèse still had one dream to fulfil. She desired to help those who were on earth. ‘I will return’ she said. ‘My heaven will be spent on earth.’ After she died, Pauline sent copies of her journals to other convents. Thérèse’s ‘little way’ surpassed Pauline’s expectations. Pauline thought they would be a help to other novices but it quickly became apparent that it was not just for them. Countless ordinary lives, thousands of Catholics who were trying to find holiness, were touched by Thérèse’s little way. Her little way reminds us who feel we can do nothing, that it is the little things that keep God’s kingdom growing!
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